character – Journey Of A Novel

Themes, imagery and the spaces in between

Tanya V 28 December 2021

I have read back over and made a few adjustments but I’m nearly done with another chapter. It was a good chapter to write with some ideas that I’d thought about a lot but never written previously. There was some back and forth of ideas that I’d not considered that happened as the words appeared.

A main scene in the chapter belongs to three characters which had me thinking and writing in such a way that I hadn’t before. The writing of it took this three handed scene in a direction that I’d not considered causing me to create gaps that I filled after rereading then rereading again to make further adjustments and fill in those gaps.

I kept returning to it after thinking it over in much the same way that I do in real life when I think I should of said/done/thought such and such a thing at the time. The difference between writing the scene and real life though is that I could shape it as best I can with hind sight stepping into real time to guide the interactions.

Writing this chapter has also had me reflecting on the background, bigger picture, undercurrents and sustained elements that are the story travelling along through the narrative accompanying the action and words. To map this and create a consistency that I am happy with I’ve created a new file to map the chapters which includes lists of imagery, themes and other elements that inhabit the spaces in between the happenings.

The wrapping up of the story is about to begin. To tidy up the details I’ll have to write one chapter, then another for the climax and resolution. How all this will work I don’t know until I write it. So when I am done with this chapter I have at least two more to write, of course that could change though.

The work that I have to do is becoming clearer the closer I get to the end of the first draft. There’s a lot of work still to be done, work that I want to get started on, work that is the next level from where I’m at, but first I need to finish up draft number one.

Observations

Tanya V 10 August 2021

Chapter seven is 4000 plus words done of the 5000 words I’ve planned to write, so the finish line is in sight. This chapter has always been a rough sketch in my mind that lacked the narrative articulation of some previous parts that I’ve worked through. Up until this chapter the protagonist has been experiencing gradual growth and development within themselves, and has been unaware of the fundamental change that this causes within them. Chapter seven is the character becoming aware of the change that is happening and recognising that they can make choices to participate in this change. I’m trying to capture the realisation that I expect everyone goes through at some point when they understand that something big is happening within them that they can’t explain or reference but only observe as a point of change.

I have found this difficult to write; when I tried to push through by writing more and more I became frustrated so I stepped back from the keyboard and took a lot of long walks where time and space allowed me to think through what the actual point of this chapter is. This chapter has caused me to stop and take stock of where I’m at and where I’m heading story-wise. The long walks have served their purpose by providing perspective. I walk and observe the world around me, myself within it, nature, the ‘vibe’ and step back from my thoughts to make room for what is beyond thought. I’ve managed to get out of my head by literally walking away from overthinking. This has facilitated descriptive writing that I have used to ‘set the scene’, provided real-time perspectives on people to consider when writing character, and been helpful for processing the world through new eyes which I require of my protagonist to demonstrate transformation.

The protagonist has reached a point in the story where other people’s influence has fallen away as it never had before, leaving space in their mind beyond reacting and responding. They are able to be alone with themselves without being inundated by thoughts that are triggers instigated by others, to be alone with themselves, to connect with their potential and realise that they can exist without outside influence. I have come to understand that this chapter is not about testing boundaries as previous chapters have been in different ways, but about discovering boundaries set by and for the self.

I keep pushing to the front of my mind that I am writing the first draft so can refine, refine, improve and polish when the time comes, but I really want to lay a solid foundation for profound yet potentially elusive personal evolution of character in a realistic way. It’s part of the human experience, we all have our aha moments, many that happen without us identifying them until later in life. It can be a little voice, a shift in our way of being, ‘growing-up’, or a change that comes about because some old structure falls away leaving room for a self deep within who’d had no space for growth. Either way, in the present moment or in reflection we observe ourselves and that is what I’m attempting to write without it being a big moment that feels forced.

A cohesive tale of players

Tanya V 1 August 2021

The character that I have introduced into the story in chapter seven is like none my protagonist has ever met before. This character is legendary, mysterious, formidable; they leave an impression on all who they meet. Few have ever met this character in the land that I am writing, but they have heard of, or know stories about their exploits in the world. For these reasons and more I need to write the character into the story beyond simply being relative to the narrative playing out for the protagonist. This character deserves to be more than a reference point to carry the weight of who they are beyond the chapter and into the time when the story is alive.

Over the years I have written background scenarios and some origin stories about the players in the tale that I am telling, I’d considered using these before but poo pooed the idea. That idea has been reignited with this new perspective that is emerging with the body of work and the development of my creative process along with it.

Once I realised this addition was beneficial to the story as a whole I began to reflect on all of the back story writing that I have done on the other main players that transit the protagonist through the major story points, and how I have included some of who they are in the chapters that I have written.

The mark that these interactions make on the protagonist are significant. They are more than background players that are happen-chanced upon, they are the story as much as the setting making their mark on the protagonist enough to influence in the moment and into the protagonist’s future. Without these characters the protagonist would have no emotional or spiritual landscape to navigate – we all need people to know who we are, personal evolution doesn’t happen by staring into a mirror.

With this in mind I came to realise that knowing these characters beyond their experiences with the protagonist creates a richer world and more complete story. It will work better to edit in these characters before or as they appear in the tale with some of each chapter dedicated to them. When writing this in I want to make the format rhythmic with regular intervals of introducing the next influential player as the chapters and narrative unfold.

This feels like a good decision. The right decision for a cohesive tale of players that shape the world and life of the protagonist and many others who live in the world that I am writing.

Herding cats

Tanya V 5 July 2021

Writing chapter six first draft feels like baby steps as I inch through the storyline toward the chapter completion. Each baby step is monumental though, each step is a new action, another happening, a story point that pushes the action forward. I have written parts for this chapter in the past, but they are rough sketches of the action that I’m fleshing out as I go by combining what I have already written with new writing.

The slow pace feels tedious but at the same time writing in the new parts is fun. Characters are unfolding in ways that I hadn’t planned with the birth of new personalities in the midst of the narrative. Along with the characters and the action the protagonist is also changing and growing through points of reflection. To integrate this I’ve covered ground in the story having the protagonist journey through the landscape as they journey into themselves. The writing of these parts took some time with the combining of these two events into one.

As I develop the novel moving through each chapter in turn, I’m finding that I have a clearer picture of not just who and where but when I’m writing about. The time period is coming to life in my mind and I hope also on the page. In writing about a past time my aim isn’t to be accurate but more so representative. My focus is on fiction and story, not historical accuracy, also the period that I’m writing about is ancient history so the information available is often sketchy or absent.

There are some things that I can’t plan, to plan to that extent would make the work feel contrived with no space for things to evolve as they should. With this in mind I’ve resigned myself to the slow pace of chapter six for now. The bottom line is that I’m getting a lot done with new nuances to the story and characters coming from the inconsistent pace.

With past chapters I’ve had some seemingly channelled through the keyboard with record speed, or others that were slow in the writing through and through. This chapter has been different in that I have a very stop-start, sit and think, rewrite, tidy, then do it all again kind of flow going – if that can be called a flow.

The stop and start feel to the whole exercise is difficult to navigate. I keep finding a reason to start later rather than sooner, then stop. Distractions stop me. Really unimportant distractions like: I need a snack, I’ll just check my email, the rubbish needs taking out, I’ll watch that video for research, make a phone call, do the dishes, the list goes on. It’s like herding cats when you are both the cat herder and the cat.

Draining the swamp

Tanya V 7 June 2021

I’ve waded through the soggy marshland of pretty words from times past to copy, paste and delete another 1000 or so. The word count is nearing 3000 words that are keepers for the first draft of chapter five with the backlog that I’m squelching through whittled down to 12500 words. At times I’m overwhelmed by the excess that I’ve written over the years and the task that this has created in the present. Words have bogged me down and I’m swamped, but enough with that metaphor…

As I work through the characters are transforming from who I thought they were with revealing glimpses at who they may become as the story unfolds. I’ve found heartache and hidden motivations; I’ve stumbled into broken dreams and disillusions; it’s been very revealing. The words that I’d originally crafted into fragments of narrative came together to reveal a different story that has left me curious about my characters. They are a fragile bunch who are all wrapped up in their own perceptions, wanting to be heard, wanting to be loved, wanting to be happy.

Even though the setting touches on fantasy I can’t make it so fantastical that they can all have their needs met so heartache will prevail for most, perhaps for all – if so, that will almost make it a biography.

The largest parts that I have been cutting are bravado, that is the writing about the character’s public faces and acts towards others. Removing the outside perspective is bringing me closer to my characters where I can better observe them. The parts that I’ve kept show the soft underbelly of the characters, who they are and how they came to be the way that they are. Motivation is key after all, well for me anyway, I need to understand why people do the things that they do to best capture the small things that mean so much.

My intention of writing this story was to show one person’s story but I find that I cannot write about one person without including the stories of all involved. To write it any other way would to be to surround my protagonist with two dimensional characters who would ultimately belittle the protagonist’s struggle; all people struggle in life.

Previously I had worried about creating the right setting and authentically capturing the landscape but increasingly I’m coming to realise that the story itself is the landscape and that the characters create the setting.

Chapter four first draft – Done!

Tanya V 23 April 2021

It reads well, I made the transition that I wanted to in the narrative taking my protagonist on a journey of physical struggle that confirms their mental resolve to keep going in the direction that they chose. Chapter four took the protagonist on a journey through the world where they travelled alone creating a parallel inward journey.

Other characters need to be introduced now. Chapter four had the introduction of one new character, but it was a meeting of few words. Chapter five will have the introduction of some major players in the narrative moving forward into the story, so chapter four was just a warm-up exercise of what chapter five will present as challenges.

The protagonist begins chapter five full of hope, ready to embrace change and harbouring a naivete that is a left over from their past. For the protagonist chapter five is meant to be the happily ever after chapter where they can settle into life, but life has other plans.

The characters that the protagonist comes to know in chapter five challenge their way of thinking and perspective, and conversely the protagonist challenges those that they meet. All these differences are a mark of each individual’s character causing all concerned to dig their heels in. A lot will unfold, important things will happen, but I want to write it as matter-o-fact. Big things happen in life for all of us and a lot of the time it’s not until later that we realise the significance of happenings in our lives. That’s what chapter five is about, big decisions, big reactions, big moves. Responses and reactions in life tell us about who we are and show us who those around us are. Important events can lift a veil that we didn’t know was there and this is the underlying driver in chapter five.

Some of the big events may spill over into chapter six, the writing of this chapter will reveal if I need to spread out the narrative to cover more ground; I certainly don’t want to cram things into one chapter for convenience. The story needs room to breathe and unfold.

The next few chapters I have written parts of in the past and I will work these pieces of writing in with new work as I go. Working in this way is slow at times as I stop and start to accommodate what I want to include along with what I newly create. It’s helpful for me to keep this in mind as the slow progress can be hard to push through at times but I have found the results, being how much work I get done, worth it.

A wee epiphany

Tanya V 17 April 2021

I dropped the ball there for a few days but not for lack of trying to keep it in play. No excuses, just the facts, I’ve been busy with other things. Time for writing has become sparse, it is not non-existent though. I have written, I’ve crossed the halfway mark in chapter four nearing 3000 words. The pressure of less time made my last sitting to write seem easier than the ones before. In the meantime my challenges writing this chapter have been playing on my mind causing me to have a wee epiphany. I kept cycling over where I was up to and what I had written and kept thinking that I had missed something. Then it came to me. Motivation, my protagonist’s drive that is beyond words. The unspoken subtext, thoughts, comparisons, and the self-referencing that all of us experience, that forces our hand in life. Why does anybody do anything? Because they can is a likely answer but there are many other unfathomable reasons as to why choices are made. Personal, subconscious and determined by an individual’s origins.

With this in mind I went back over what I had written in chapter four to date and added symbolism, imagery and small happenings that addressed ‘the why’ or motivation in an indirect way. The subtext is as important as the text.

I didn’t add big sections or seek to make the profound out of the simple. I wanted to weave an extra thread through the fabric of the story to bring it all together as a whole piece. My intention was to stick with the ‘less is more’ ethos but it did need a little more.

A new character has been introduced to the story and the protagonist which is a turning point that foreshadows what is to come. Writing that I had done previously on this moment of meeting has worked in nicely with what I have newly written in. Leading up to this new character has taken the protagonist, along with my imagination, into a new realm of the story. The gears are shifting in my creative process.

The next few chapters have large sections already written that I will pull apart to re-edit in with new work. This is playing on my mind as a distraction; anticipating what is to come detracts from where I am at. Knowing this is helpful to acknowledge when I am distracted jumping ahead with ideas and maybes instead of being focused.

So back to keeping the ball in play.

I’ve got to keep my mind on the ball and my eye on the game, or something like that.

I don’t know anything

Tanya V 9 April 2021

A new character is about to be introduced into the story. This character is one that I have been musing over for a long time. I feel like I know them, and I don’t like this character very much. Approaching this section feels like preparing to go and spend time with people that I don’t particularly like, part of me has switched off to prepare for the experience. I’m trying not to have a fixed mindset, to be open-minded, to let go of preconceived notions; it’s difficult. My response is emotional, it’s deep-seated and I just have to get over it and shake it off.

As much as I can I want to write whole characters that have depth my characters don’t always have a lot of time on the page so capturing authenticity of character when they are introduced into the story is important. People and characters don’t have to be likeable to be of value and being hard to like does not make someone a bad person. I’ll press through to let my character be who and what they will using the world around me to observe and hopefully learn from watching without expectation or judgement.

Knowing that this character is on the horizon is perhaps one reason that I’ve dragged my feet through chapter four. The more ground that I cover, the closer I am to writing this part. One thing that chronicling my creative process here has taught me though is that the angst is worse than the practise. Avoidance is based in uncertainty and I can’t be certain until I just do it. (…get over it, shake it off, just do it – I’m on fire with the catch phrases and slogans tonight…)

Writing through chapter four has progressed more. I have written another section making my way to the halfway point. The story points that I wanted to address to get to where I am in chapter four had been larger in my mind. I thought that they would take up more space on the page and in the story. The ideas that I had about this have baulked me at times when I sit and stare at the page wondering what to add, thinking to myself that surely there must be more. Then I snap out of it realising that the story is what is important not the word count, and that I’m working on a work in progress. That’s key for me to acknowledge, it’s in progress, things change, it needs room to grow, and I should proceed into the unknown to make it known.

Preconceived notions cause feet dragging. With that piece of knowledge kicking around in the front of my mind I’m going to spend the next day relaxing into a state of aware open-mindedness. I don’t know anything, I need to observe, I will allow the unexpected to occur. That’s where I want my head to be as I proceed so that I can write as much or as little as I need and also let a new character grow beyond my narrow-minded view.